(* For privacy protection, names of individual students have been changed in this story.)

Junior Steph* and freshman Bob’s * childhood home in Mexico has been empty for four years, besides during the occasional times their grandparents returned to visit. 

Their rooms stay untouched as well as their parents’. The cold, stone walls chill the house where, before, there was at least a family to warm it up. The dark and shiny couch in the living room sits stationary with no one around to help serve its purpose. Hot summers spent in the cool living room watching TV are memories to Steph. Bob’s teddy bear now lives in solitude in the room he and his sister used to share.

A home is defined by a place where one has lived, but Steph and Bob have two, each home residing in very different worlds from each other. The two siblings left one home for another, stepping into a new world as Mexican immigrants in the United States.

Steph and Bob lived in Mexico City, sharing a home with their grandparents up until they were 13 and 11, respectively. During their childhoods there, the two siblings mainly went to school and played games which was an easy, nice life for them. For Bob, life was very social.

“At my school, I used to get a lot of awards from being the most happy person,” Bob said. “I had a bunch of friends in Mexico, so I would always be the guy that’s always laughing for no reason and just smiling.”

Steph spent her time playing various sports, including football, swimming, taekwondo, kickboxing, and even belly dance and jazz, but overall, she enjoyed going to school the most.

“In Mexico, I really never had friends,” Steph said. “I only went to school and I’d stay home. It was a nice life. I’m not complaining about it, but it was definitely not as fun as it is here.”

In May of 2021, their family traveled to Texas for a temporary summer vacation, expecting to return after a few months. But after three months of the trip, their parents unexpectedly had a change of heart.

“It wasn’t our first time being here,” Steph said. “But those few months that we stayed here, my parents were really happy, and, after the quarantine, it was something that we were not experiencing in Mexico because of economically bad situations. But here in 2021, things were normal even though quarantine happened. That’s what my parents wanted, a better life, the American dream.”

At first, the news from her parents prompted a mix of emotions from Steph. Considering the time they already spent in America, Steph was ready to leave.

“I was not happy,” Steph said. “When my dad told us that we were staying, I was frustrated and confused because I was like, what is gonna happen to our life in Mexico? We have everything there.”

The family stayed with Steph and Bob’s aunt’s family, who has lived in America for 18 years. For five months, the two families, including their grandparents, which was a total of 10 people, lived in one house together. The house was one story with two bedrooms and one bathroom.

“It was so crazy,” Steph said. “It was a pain. My cousin was four, my other cousin was eight, my brother was 10, and I was 13. We were going through a lot, and we were fighting all the time, so we wanted to leave.”

At the time, the siblings knew little English, knowing only basic greetings like “Hello,” and “How are you?” In the beginning, their parents spoke more than them, but with the help from their cousins and language courses they took online, their English started to improve.

Through the uncertainty of their situation, Steph and Bob’s family learned to adjust and grow, helping each other in the process and finding a sentiment in the smaller things. The first part of this adjustment period began with buying their own place. 

“I have an attachment to my sofa because it’s like, ‘Oh my God, I remember the first day that we bought it,’” Steph said. “Adjusting to our new life was very nice because my parents were truly happy and I was truly happy too. Now, our own space was such a relief and freedom, so we love that.”

Mexico and America are different in their infrastructure and overall quality of life; Steph and Bob noticed the change in scenery. 

“The education is just so much better, and the streets are clean,” Bob said. “People just take care of everything and it makes it look pretty and clean. We realized everything was cheaper because here you actually get paid enough to where you can buy expensive stuff every once in a while.”

The family applied for American citizenship in 2014 and expected up to 15 years for the process to be officiated. However, their wait time for citizenship now has extended to 21 years. 

“Every single time my friends complain about having a job, I get so upset because I wish I could complain about my job too,” Steph said. “A lot of the scholarship requirements are to be a citizen and that’s very insane. I cannot get my permit or my driver’s license. I cannot work. I cannot afford college. Everyone has a car, everyone has a job, I want that too.”

After President Donald Trump returned to office earlier this year, executive orders addressing topics of undocumented immigrants and southern border control have sparked dividing opinions nationwide. 

The family has not experienced great changes from this executive action, but as the country reinstates more stringent border policies, the family has become more cautious. 

“We still take care of each other because we never know when something bad can happen,” Bob said. “I think the new policies are unfair because only a small percentage of immigrants do bad things. Those are the ones that should get deported, not the ones that work all day and help the economy work even though they don’t have proper paperwork.”

Personally experiencing what it’s like to be undocumented in America, the siblings want people to educate themselves and start viewing immigrants simply as human beings.

“Immigrants hold this country together, economically, socially, everything,” Steph said. “By just taking them away and treating them like objects, I think it’s so stupid because most of them are the most welcoming and understanding people because of their situation.”

Bob said he truly feels he belongs in the U.S. Steph doesn’t feel the same.

“I don’t really consider myself an American,” Steph said. “Don’t get me wrong, I love the culture, ‘;but I don’t think I ever will belong to it. Most of my teen years were in Mexico, so I think that shaped me as a person, and I will always be grateful for that. I don’t feel like an outsider, but I also don’t feel like this is home.”

Individually, the siblings have learned about themselves and their identities through these experiences of change. 

A philosophical YouTuber called “Profound Pondering,” who Bob frequently watched to improve his English, posed the thought provoking question that striked Bob when he first moved to America: “If you have the ability to start over from the beginning, would you do it?” Moving to another country was what Bob found as his new beginning.

“I’m starting over here in America because I’m basically a new person,” Bob said. “If I was a bad guy in Mexico, I can be a great guy here or the opposite. I was already a good guy, but I decided to become even better. I wanted people to see me and be like, ‘You definitely belong here because you are a great example and we want you to stay.’”

Similarly, Steph realized ways to let go.

“I have learned not to become attached to anyone or anything,” Steph said. “That’s because if I go to my house in Mexico right now, it would be how I left it five years ago. We were expecting to come back, but we never did. Eventually you could just either leave or everything could just go away.”

For their future, Steph has goals to become a business developer in architecture and Bob sees a future in running his own business. They both are now well adjusted to America, speaking English fluently and having stronger relationships within their family and with friends. 

While the family has moved and they no longer live in the same house nor the same country they did 4 years ago, what remains with them is the care they have for each other, perhaps what makes their homes a home, no matter the location or the border separating them from their history. Steph and Bob’s bond with each other and their parents has only been strengthened by their entire journey in adjusting, belonging, and learning how to support each other.

“We built a strong relationship, so when we moved here, it was very nice to have that, because we needed each other the most,” Steph said.